You’re ready to start taking care of yourself. You want to find ways to handle stress. Someone mentions meditation. No! That’s not for you. Or is it?
You might be imagining yourself sitting on a pillow with your eyes closed, trying to attain some zen-like state. When I began my practice, I was thinking the same thing. I wanted to empty my mind and find a more peaceful existence. I’d heard about meditation, and was pretty sure I knew what it was all about. I was going to be an incredible meditator! I learned pretty soon, however, that the best way for me to meditate, was to avoid becoming a meditator.
Generally people practice three types of meditation:
1. Concentrative (think of ashrams, or retreats, where people sit quietly in the lotus position)
2. Mindful (these include walking meditations, where there is no particular focus)
3. Expressive (they can involve some kind of movement, like dancing or whirling to music)
I tried them all and still felt like I wasn’t getting anywhere. Even dancing (which I adore) seemed like a chore when it was a part of a stress management program. If anything, I was beginning to feel more stressed! Still, I persevered.
Then one day, it hit me: maybe I didn’t need to do this. What if I stopped trying to meditate correctly? This changed everything. When I stopped being a meditator, I became more aware of what was going on inside my head and all around me.
I didn’t need to “do” anything. I just needed to be aware of what was going on. As it turns out, awareness happens all by itself. I began to notice during the day, times that I’d feel tension somewhere in my body. Sometimes I experienced muscle pain or stiff joints. But if I just watched, without trying to change things, my pain and stress subsided.
The modern-day spiritual teacher Adyashanti, asks:
– What happens when you relinquish control?
– What happens when you don’t make effort?
– What happens when you meditate without the meditator?
Now I “meditate” all the time. I still sometimes sit quietly, and I love walking in nature or dancing, but most of my meditations are infused in everyday activities. I go about my day and simply watch what happens. I suppose I do have a mantra. Whether I’m having difficulty at work, standing in a long line at a store or listening to an agitated friend, I take a deep breath and say to myself “Allow it”.
What are some ways you have found to become more aware of your surroundings, or of what is going on inside your body? Post your comment below! I’d love to see them
